Day 4
Feeling good enough to go for a run.
Big mistake.
Legs felt wobbly, thought I would faint, and quite possibly suffering from hallucinations. Unless that actually was a civil war re-enactment society practicing in my neighborhood.
Wife says, “Don’t forget to carbo-load on fruit before vigorous exercise!”
Thanks. File that under “Things I wish I had known before attempting a 5-mile afternoon run in Texas in August.”
Day 5
I ate lots of fruit and veggies. I felt great! Then I saw the grocery bill. I no longer felt great. Eating this much produce is very expensive. It’s at least as expensive as eating lots of meat. Ponder this.
Day 6
When I woke up this morning, I told my wife I had had an incredible sex dream. It had been a while. Before that come-hither look on her face even had a chance to form, I explained that it was actually a sex dream about Chinese food. Just eating and rolling around in greasy, delicious Chinese food. I may have also quickly followed up this remark with something about thinking I had possibly sharted. What can I say? I really know how to make her feel special.
It should be noted that eating this way could potentially do some disastrous things to your digestive tract. As with any detox (or drastic change in diet), your stomach might get a little gnarly. Consider pairing your fruits and veggies wisely to avoid adding to your distress.
Day 7
Home stretch. We hired a babysitter and booked a table at our favorite Chinese restaurant. We chose vegan food from the menu, and everything was cooked. It felt positively sinful. It was the BEST Chinese food we’ve ever had.
Would I do it again? Maybe not. But I know I could do it if I needed to. Realistically, I find myself unconsciously eating raw for about 50% of my meals. And – most importantly – not totally hating my life.
