Essayist Tim Kreider recently wrote about being 48, single, and—to the astonishment and disgust of his 14-year-old self—not always in the mood for sex.
It’s a common refrain for middle-aged men: Our testosterone levels take a dip after age 30 causing us to sometimes feel excessively fatigued, weaker, depressed, and suffer from a greatly declined sex drive.
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Kreider writes:
We experience the ebbing of testosterone not just as a lessening of libido but as a lessening of desire in general, a loss of certitude, of pleasure, and of will. We wonder what the hell ever happened to the old Us. We don’t seem to enjoy anything as much as we used to. I’m neither as angry nor as hilarious as I used to be. It’s not as if you can gently excise a man’s belligerence and lechery and salvage a perfect gentleman. It’d be like extracting Hyde from Jekyll. What remained would be a shrunken, pallid thing, weak and ineffectual.
Kreider goes on to discuss his options in dealing with the testosterone loss. There’s the chemical solution, with testosterone supplements or other natural remedies. There’s general acceptance, the existential recognition that maybe he’s just had enough, and this new stage of life just has different pleasures:
Maybe you can get what you thought you wanted only so many times before it loses its allure.
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He ultimately cites a study that suggests that testosterone decline occurs only as a function of a general decline in health — that is, men who remain healthy and active don’t experience it. Kreider decided it was time for a lifestyle change. He bought a new bike, started working outside in the sun and lightened his outlook on life:
Maybe I hadn’t been declining; maybe I was just depressed. I found myself cracking my friends up over beers again, taking stupid risks in Manhattan traffic, and, for the first time in years, euphorically giddy over a woman who is guaranteed to break my heart. To quote my favorite triumph-of-the-human-spirit film: I was cured, all right. This is probably only a temporary reprieve. But who’s to say?
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There are a variety of reasons why men’s testosterone levels take a dip once we hit a certain age, and there are even more recommendations out there to combat it. It’s important to do the research before deciding what’s right for you.
Curated Article and Photo Credit from Men’s Journal
